Coming Demolishing Earth
Winter has officially become the Kim Kardashian of seasons: we all want it to go away but we can’t stop talking about it. Is it really that surprising that when the temperature reaches 40 degrees or lower, it’s going to be cold? Did I miss something about the Northeast not being used to snow?
Apparently it got so cold in North Carolina, someone’s Jeep left an ice sculpture in the parking lot. I wonder if they book for weddings?
Even colder was upstate New York where tourists were delightfully surprised by Niagara Falls being FRO-OOO-OOO-ZEN! (Anyone else love Story of My Life by One Direction?)
What’s more crazy than Niagara falls actually freezing is that there were vacationers in upstate New York in the dead of winter.
Humanity Isn’t a Complete Loss
One person who isn’t suffering the harshness of winter anymore, though, is Detroit James. A few weeks ago I told the tale of Detroit James: the man who despite having no car walks 20+ miles to work everyday. I have to reiterate that he is also on time every day.
In the time his story went viral, various donations were placed to help raise over $350,000 for him. Aside from his bank account quadruplicating over night, he was also given a brand new Ford Taurus by a local dealership. I think we can all learn a lot from Detroit James in that if your struggle is real, someone will likely notice and solve your problems. On that note, I’ll be walking to work on Monday.
Husband Face and I finally watched The Theory of Everything and I cried 8 times. Basically my eyes were Niagara Falls in summertime. The movie was fantastic but Eddie Redmayne killed it as Stephen Hawking causing referenced tear storm.
At one point I couldn’t tell if I was crying over my empathy toward the character or the sadness I felt for not being the slightest bit intelligent.
We also watched the Saturday Night Live 40th reunion show. A lot of people were disappointed but I genuinely enjoyed the commemorative nature of it. A lot of shit’s gone down on that set and it would be a crime not to pay significant homage to it. The only thing that ruined it is the same thing the ruins all things…Kanye West.
There was a time, years a go, when I thoroughly enjoyed Kanye West’s music. I never much cared for the individual but his music I was all about. I feel the same way about Mariah Carey but even she looks normal next to him. Along with ruining the momentum of SNL 40, he completely bombed at New York Fashion Week. Although unsurprising that he attempted it, I am surprised that he thought this would go over well:
If Kanye’s jowls weren’t so easily recognizable I would assume this was the manikin warehouse for H&M.
His publicist must have gotten a raise this week or been on the chopping block because Kanye couldn’t find himself out of the media. Outside the fashion world and into his past life, Kanye and his ex-girlfriend Amber Rose, got into the most deliciously immature shade-war ever.
First he said he needed at least 30 showers after he dated Amber Rose before Kim Would date him.
Then she retaliated so perfectly with:
There was some more back and forth between Amber and Khloe but it’s less funny.
A couple with 100% less drama but 500% more of my attention is the newly confirmed couple of Hermione and Prince Harry! She did it! The half-blood finally got her Ron Weasley! It’s still pretty early in the confirmation of this information but I support it wholeheartedly. Can you imagine Emma Watson becoming a part of the royal family and having brunch with Kate? I just can’t even stand life right now.
Finally, we come to the world of wrestling to find some dirty secrets and of course some drama. This week, the doctors CM Punk accused of ignoring his grotesque back growth he claimed to be cultivating, disproved his bullshit with video evidence. Basically, CM punk is still a piece of shit, it’s just a fact now.