The Internet Destroyed Traveling

I officially have no desire to travel to, through or around Asia. In case you missed it or are still emerging from the glory of your bed, another Asian airline had a bit of an accident yesterday.


Did anyone else expect to see a tiny Asian exiting the yellow car and vomiting violently? I can’t tell if I would be more terrified being inside the plane or inside either car. Let’s go ahead and add “no driving in Asia” to the list of things I won’t be doing soon.

Call me crazy but does air travel seem like a Saw movie these days? As a kid, I don’t remember having the fear I have as an adult of getting into a sealed, metal, flying contraption and traveling faster than comprehensible. It was fun and exciting and my puny brain capacity probably thought turbulence was a plane fart.

The fear of flying I’ve developed as an adult can 100% be attributed to the Internet.

Television news channels have their fair share of bullshit news stories. They cover every semblance of a story from every arm pit of the country. As an adult, this jut makes me scared shitless of the South.

But the internet’s ability to occupy us until infinity has also caused the “I need to know all things at all times” syndrome. If there is a pilot who let some models dick around in the cockpit, you’ll know about it. If there are some scary ass landing strips in the world, there’s a Buzzfeed list for that. If a passenger sneezes on their SkyMall magazine, WebMD will tell you all the ways you’ll die from germ transmission.

If a wheel snaps on and the plane lands seamlessly without any passengers the wiser, some asshole’s shaky iPhone recording will upload it, most certainly going viral.
Even if you don’t seek these stories out, the Internet has this awesome way of finding you. At that point, not clicking would just be stupid so you watch the video. Now you’re a shell of your former self and wanderlust is a death wish.

Maybe, instead of wishing I could tele-port to and fro I could just wish to be illiterate. That way, reading in capabilities would shield me from going into the internet abyss and coming out 500 websites later with 6 new phobias, all diagnosed by

4 thoughts on “The Internet Destroyed Traveling”

  1. lmao I sincerely hope your male friend was not, in fact, preggo. That would be worse than the diagnosis WebMD provided.
    The media is as ridiculous as the news they cover and scare me all the time. It’s nice to hear your pilot pops agrees.

    thanks for the read and the comment love!

  2. This is so true… and a lot of these stories are reported so inaccurately that they make us even crazier! My dad is a pilot and sometimes it’s interesting to hear his take on something and then see what the Internet/media said about it.

    On an entirely different WebMD note, my friend once put in his two symptoms as “male” and “leg pain.” He found out he was pregnant. I wonder if SkyMall was the father.

    Great post!

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