Call me Jane Balboa

Weeks ago, my sister asked me to join her for some school assignment where we had to go take a kickboxing class at a local gym. I know, what school does she go to and what’s her major? The gym the class was held at what ended up being the same gym I took last Saturday’s TRX class at and more recently, took a Monday night cardio boxing class.

I’ve always known that my sweet demeanor must surely be a front for some underlying anger that I seldom let out. Over the years I’ve seen glimpses of this beast when I get really upset and throw something like a child. When I really discovered the demon is when I took a few cardio kickboxing classes at a different, martial arts gym. There was something about beating the shit out of a bag, my partner’s gloves and my body that felt oddly therapeutic.


The cardio boxing class I took on Monday was no different and if anything, made my addiction to beating the shit out of something strengthen. I’ve never boxed or taken any true classes on form or self-defense, but I find myself naturally falling into decent form. The class was an hour broken up in to 15 minutes of warm up, 30 minutes of bag work and 15 minute cool down aka core destruction. It doesn’t sound bad when you think in those terms but slamming your fists into a bag for 30 minutes is 1.) exhausting, 2.) so empowering you can’t help but hit harder next time, 3.) making it perpetually more exhausting.

The best part about the entire class was that it’s taught by the number 1 ranked “cruiserweight” boxer in the world. Is he retired, you ask? Um no, he just had a fight as recent as September. His name is Francisco Palacios and he’s hails from the island of Puerto Rico. He’s 6’2″ with a massive heart and one of the nicest people I’ve seen work at a gym. Did I mention that he’s fought 23 fights and won 21 of those. Out of those 21 fights, 13 of them were by knockout. Oh, and he has his own Wikipedia page. Needless to say, we have a mothereffing champ teaching an army of college kids how to fight. Is this illegal?


The combination of a badass instructor that could take anyone at anytime, coaching us how to box against massive bags in a gym with an actual ring in it and Mr. Ali staring at you from posters galore, it’s hard not to get in the fighting zone. I got a little lost in the punches and left with bruised knuckles from my lack of hand-wrapping under my gloves. Who knew 3 inches of padding wouldn’t be enough?

The workout ended up being one of the best I’ve ever had and left me feeling so good, I considered coming to their 6 a.m. class. Considered. Now I get why Rhianna went back to Chris Breezy.
As I’ve previously written about, I get distracted from a workout very easily. It’s not that I’m bored but eventually I find something better that comes along and love more. I have 27 days left of unlimited classes and by the end I will evaluate how I feel. If I still love it with every masochistic bone in my body, good-bye Planet Fitness, hello boxing world.


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